As most new parents will agree, becoming a family can be a challenging as well as a joyous experience, particularly at the early stages. Adapting to new routines and a lack of sleep can be hard to navigate, and that’s before the demands of a career are taken into consideration.
Recognising the challenge in maintaining this balance, the NIAO supports staff by offering employees enhanced shared parental leave, allowing new parents to receive their full contractual pay for up to 24 weeks after taking their two weeks paternity.
One staff member to avail of this is Peter, an Auditor at NIAO.
Peter, who has two children (Louie, age 2 and Catherine, age 1) opted to share parental leave with his wife Tracey, a teacher, after the births of their children.
Talking about his decision, Peter describes how it arose after very bittersweet circumstances:
“We discovered about a week after my father’s death that my wife was 4 weeks pregnant and I resolved that I wanted to be hands-on and involved like my dad was and pass on that legacy.
“I wasn’t the first in the office to avail of the option for shared parental leave, and I know from colleagues’ experiences that it had worked well for them.”
Peter agreed that with his wife he would take six months of leave, allowing Tracey to return to work after three months while he stayed at home.
So, what did the additional leave allow Peter to do?
“What it didn’t allow me to do was all of the DIY, decorating and gardening I had planned. We had just bought a house three months before Louie was born and I finished work with lots of big ideas - obviously that didn’t materialise!
“It did allow me to just be on hand to support Tracey, and have more time to bond and do my share of the work. Going from two of us to three was a big change and it allowed me time to settle into the new family unit without the added pressure of work.
“My wife could’ve coped on her own, but it’s great that she didn’t have to. Self-praise is no praise but in the first three months I think she found it really helpful to have a second pair of hands.”
And what about when Tracey returned to work and Peter remained at home to look after baby Louie on his own?
“It allowed me to prove to myself that I could do it – that I could be an equal parent. It also helped me develop an appreciation of what’s involved.”
When daughter Catherine was born 18 months after Louie, Peter again decided to take six months of parental leave (this time the DIY plans were scaled back…) and again, found it to have been the right decision:
“We actually had a small scare with Catherine when she was a few weeks old. She was back in hospital for a week or so and then out again - totally fine, healthy and happy. But the fact that I was already on that extended period of leave as opposed to two weeks meant that I was able to focus totally on Catherine’s health during that period, rather than having one eye on whether I would need to go back to work. The practicalities of knowing I was off made it a lot easier to focus on her.”
“I also enjoyed having that extra time to bond with Louie after Catherine was born. I could take him to parent and toddler groups, sometimes as the only father in a hall full of mothers and children. It helped ease him into his role as a big brother too”
And how did he find the return to work?
“As I approached the last month of leave I grew more and more content with the idea of coming back. I was happy that I’d had a good experience with Louie that he was at the stage where he was fit for nursery. I had kept in touch with colleagues and managers while I was off to keep myself in the loop and felt ready to return. After my second spell of shared leave, I knew exactly what to expect when I came back.”
Reflecting on his experiences as a parent, Peter concludes that the flexibility of shared parental leave has been hugely beneficial for his family, and that other flexible working options available to NIAO staff (flexi time, working from home) have continued to be valuable.
“I have friends who are at the same stage in their lives as me, and they have had to change careers to cope with the changes that come with starting a family. I count myself lucky that I am in a job that lends itself to flexibility and it’s great that the option is there.
“Flexible working options are vital to helping fathers take on an equal share of parenting, and as my children grow up it’s important that I’ll be able to see their school plays and I’ll make it to their parent-teacher meetings – I’ll be around and involved and work-place flexibility is key to that.”
